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I’m Cheddar. I hold my fry in a relaxed, ketchup-dipped, ready-to-eat position. Swiss and Jack follow suit with fork and knife. Murican guards our backs with frychakus in hand… I sense his body quivering with tense energy waiting to be triggered in juicy, flavor release.

We’re not wearing costumes.

We’re the Teenage Mutant Ninja Burgers.

Turtles on the full, toasted bun, turtle power! 

  • White people:

    You have to wait for the facts before you talk about Ferguson!

  • Eyewitnesses:

    He was on his knees with his hands up.

  • Medical examiner:

    There was no gunpowder residue on Mike Brown, no sign of struggle, and there were entry wounds on the inside of his arms and the top of his head, implying he was on his knees with his hands up.

  • Convenience store owner and clerk:

    There was no robbery and we didn't call the cops.

  • Ferguson PD:

    Okay, we admit it, Wilson didn't know anything happened at the convenience store and we determined no crime was committed.

  • ...

  • ...

  • ...

  • White people:

    Nobody can say what happened! We still have to wait for the facts to come in!

  • This White Person:

    It was an infringement of civil rights, start to finish, and continuing.



Aw the #GOP #TeaParty desire to deregulate everything. #America doesn’t understand the #chaos it would bring. #polluted air & water & products sold on trust, not safe, clean, labeled, manner. #Libertarian #progressive #liberals #society #humanity #commonsense #regulations #government #funny #awesome

this is the kind of shit I get recommended. hahahahahahahaha

LOL. That’s actually a good one. 

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